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When we’re burnt out, we don’t enjoy life as m

When we’re burnt out, we don’t enjoy life as much. It’s harder to ground ourselves, coach ourselves and rationalise anxious thoughts.

We need rest, respite, slowness to be able to enjoy the good things.

Even laughter requires energy. Sometimes we have to break the cycle. The more overwhelmed we are, the more critical our internal dialogue, the more self-destructive and sabotaging we become. The less we enjoy life and the lower our self-esteem dips.

I know. It’s a bit chicken and egg. I always ignored the need to rest so that I could give more. But as a result, I got less of the things that made my own life feel enjoyable - laughter, connection and purpose.

Reprioritise. Rest. Somehow.

Want more on this? Delve into my book, Know Your Worth for loads of tips and insights.

Axx

When have you overlooked a 'want' to meet a 'need'

When have you overlooked a 'want' to meet a 'need' lately?

I want to fly around the house ticking stuff off my list. I need rest.
I want to curl into a ball of comfort.
I need to lean on someone else.
I want to eat an entire bag of chocolate raisins.
I need to externalise my feelings and have them comforted.
I want wine.
I need to wind down slowly.
I want to scroll.
I need space.
I want to appear strong.
I need to lean into vulnerability.

Culture will tell you to go grab what you need, even if it requires a credit card or a hangover. YOLO! But if you really want to challenge, change and grow, then tune into the whisper of need instead.

I gently approach topics like this in my NEW BOOOOOOK
'The Uncomfortable Truth: change your life by taming ten of your mind's greatest fears' so if this resonates, go and preorder 📕 ❤️👯‍♀️

You’ll never please everyone by making yourself

You’ll never please everyone by making yourself small. Just as you’ll never please anyone by being authentic and allowing yourself to grow.

Fearing being too much or not being enough, are both born out of the same fear of being yourself.

Life is too short to spend it running away from who you are out of fear of other’s opinions (which are subjective, potentially wrong, and often nothing like you assume anyway!)

Ps - I know these things are easy to say, hard to put into practice and believe. But it IS possible to get to that place where the fear of not pleasing others doesn’t get in the way of being more ‘you’.

This is what my ‘People-Pleasing Course’ is about. My life has changed as my intense need to please others in order to feel valid, has shifted slowly.

A xx

Don’t panic if you missed last week’s exciting

We need to rebel. How have you rebelled recently?

We need to rebel.

How have you rebelled recently?
Or which do you desire to do more....or less of?

❤️❤️

This has been a life-changing, game-changing appro

This has been a life-changing, game-changing approach for me and one I want for you. It’s not easy but it does get easier. What are you going to add?

To move towards these things, grab a copy of Know Your Worth, or Raising a Happier Mother, immerse yourself in @therapy_edit_podcast or hunt my website for resources to help nurture self-esteem xx

We're minus one kid tonight. So 'just' have the tw

We're minus one kid tonight. So 'just' have the two.

I'll never forget meeting a mum at a playgroup with her three kids. I'd struggled to get my two kids - a toddler and newborn out of the house and was in awe of her with three.

'Wow. How do you do it? And I've only got the two' I said.

'I've got 6 more at home' she replied.

There and then I felt like I should be finding things a breeze with two. I only had two kids. She had 9.

The thing is, your hard is your hard. It's been a breezier day today having two instead of three, because it's less than I'm used to. It's not saying that two is easy. Or one is easy. It's just that when some of the 'normal' responsibility is lifted from our shoulders, it feels a little...lighter.

If I was used to lifting 10kg weights in the gym, and you gave me. 5kg, I'd find it easier.

If you were used to lifting 5kg, and someone gave you a 2kg, you'd find it lighter.

We all have capacity's and demands on our resources. Our muscles grow to carry the weight we need to carry, and then we feel a fresh ease when it's temporarily lifted.

Also, one kid can feel like 100 when you're exhausted. And 5 kids can feel doable when you're well-resourced with support around you. So again, it's just another angle on comparison.

Validate your hard, and enjoy your ease, because if you look outside of yourself for validation, you'll only find a million reasons to feel undeserving or ashamed of your feelings.

Anyway, this is just something I've been musing over and I thought it might help ❤️❤️

The more you embrace the vastly uncomfortable trut

The more you embrace the vastly uncomfortable truth that your life is finite, the more you will want to live more intentionally.

It's an uncomfortable truth. One that I both dance with, and retreat from. It's like looking at the sun, you can't glance too long as it can be all consuming, but you can let its presence be a light to your path.

My hope, as you read my new book: ‘The Uncomfortable Truth: Change Your Life by Taming 10 Of Your Mind’s Greatest Fears’ is that you’ll start to realise how freeing it could be to live life against the backdrop of death in the realisation that each day is a gift, not a given.

If my life is going to end, I want to live it as well as I can. If I don’t know when that’s going to happen, then I want to make sure I grasp it with both hands.

I want to make decisions that align with my passions, I want to find meaning, I want to spend time with those I love. I want to try and make sure I’m not wasting my days and my attention.
xx

Read that again 👆🏼👆🏼 'But it's okay f

Read that again 👆🏼👆🏼

'But it's okay for her because...'
'If you think that's hard, you should try dealing with....'

When people...or we ourselves, play this 'one-upmanship game' on one another, it can feel like there's some sort of hierarchy of the right to feel.

There will always be someone better or worse off than you.

We could all do with leaning into gratitude and acknowledging our privilege to help us bring some joy, light and balance into our situations but beating ourselves up for having human responses to stress and challenge helps nobody.

When we play trauma top-trumps, or stress-snap, we're really just looking for an external nod of permission to be allowed to...feel how we feel.

The challenge is, that unless we find the one person who has had the world's worst experience....everyone loses the game, and nobody truly has the right to feel sad, or overwhelmed, or lonely, or...anything really.

So, instead of allowing your overwhelm, or tiredness, or...whatever emotion it is, to be layered over with shame, guilt and feelings of failure, just validate it, acknowledge it and reach out if needs be.

Taking responsibility for validating and holding space for ourselves means that we won't feel so misunderstood when others aren't able to. It's really quite freeing!

I talk about this in depth in the chapter called 'People will misunderstand me' in my upcoming book The Uncomfortable Truth' (preorder nowwww 👯‍♀️) Because as we begin to accept that not everyone will be able to understand or validate our experiences, we can begin to find ways to do it for ourselves.

Anna x

We can’t always take a physical break, but somet

We can’t always take a physical break, but sometimes we need to give ourselves permission to temporarily step away from something so we can use the headspace or energy for other things. Don’t forget, you need energy to laugh, rationalise anxious thoughts and be present!

Axx

In this Friday guest episode of The Therapy Edit,

In this Friday guest episode of The Therapy Edit, I chat to digital creator and champion of all things fatherhood, @Robertdouglas_ about his One Thing. Robert discusses how Dads should be supported and empowered to step into a main character role instead of that of a supporting actor.

A dad of two, social entrepreneur and advocate for empowerment, Robert provides positive, honest and hopefully insightful takes on what he is learning as a parent that both mums and dads can get onboard with.

Robert owns his own production company dedicated to developing talent from under-served communities.

We’re certain Robert’s words ill resonate with plenty of parents out there so please don’t forget to share this episode with friends who might need it and together we can all encourage a societal shift to support Dads to become main characters in the story of parenting.

Anna and Robert x

#TheTherapyEdit #Dadlife #fatherhood #parenthood #therapy

So many uncomfortable truths. But that's where the

So many uncomfortable truths. But that's where the growth sits.

My book 'The Uncomfortable Truth: change your life by taming ten of your minds greatest fears' is all about finding a gentle acceptance of life's truths so that you can change and grow as a result. It is out soon!!! Preorder on @waterstones and @amazonuk

These are just some of the things that work for me

These are just some of the things that work for me. What would you add?

A xx

I am trying my best, I am human. Try to respond

I am trying my best, I am human.

Try to respond to trips and stumbles with compassion rather than a sharp word of criticism and a nudging up of the standards.

Treat yourself like someone worthy of patience and space to learn and grow as you go.

I’m definitely a work in progress, but I’m getting there! How about you?

Ps thank you for all your lovely messages about my new book, The Uncomfortable Truth: Change Your Life By Taming Your Greatest Fears, I cannot wait for you to get your hands on it in August! Pre-order now for delivery on publication day ❤️

Anna is a mum of three, and a Psychotherapist, Author and Speaker. She is a warm communicator with a passion for taking therapy out of the therapy room.

Her hope is that through words, spoken or written, people will experience light-bulb moments, learn about themselves and be able to find more freedom and enjoyment in life.

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